cultural tourism

Going on bike tour is kinda like acceptable slumming.  or "slumming it"

This statement is obviously controversial; its not always the case for sure.  But this morning, as I woke up from a bed, drank from my cafe au lait, and began typing on my computer, I thought to myself, "man living in civilisation is nice."  Maybe it's because class has been on my mind since entering into SF.  I thought deeply about what I had just said.  About how yeah, when I'm camping and riding my bike, I'm kinda pretending like I live outside, like I'm homeless? like a wanderer, drifter.  I'm seeking to shift my world perspective, by removing myself from my comfort zone, I'm hoping to grow from experiences that are out of my day to day.  The same can be said for someone who is "slumming it"

I like this definition best from urban dictionary, especially the reference to pulp's "common people"

Young-ish, wealthy parasites feeding off the lifestyles of the urban working classes in order to appear cool or hard. These hypocrites typically hang with their new poorer friends for a while, find out the daily grind isn't exactly what they had envisioned, get bored or scared or tired of having to actually work for once, and then return to their trust funds. For the quintessential example of slumming, listen to Pulp's album A Different Class, and their song "Common People".

I'm going to be honest for a moment. When I lived in Portland, the years 2008-2009, I believe I was in fact slumming it. Oh I feel like a shit to say this.  Of course, there was other things going on. I can justify to my conscience's content, but I purposefully lived underneath my means to "grow" myself: my work ethic, my appreciation of objects, and my ingenuity.
 

And it worked well actually.  While I never denied my privilege, I did feel like I wanted to hide that part of myself from the people I casually met because I did not want them to judge my actions based on my father's money.  I started to realize what I was doing towards the end of 2009.  I resolved to stop denying/running away from my privilege.  I resolved to use it for the betterment of society.  Because to be given/born into such resources, and to squander them or make no good use of them, that is an even bigger insult to those who do not have then to live in your wealthy society oblivious to the plight of the less fortunate.  

But this is not the point I actually want to make.  I'm thinking about how bike touring is just another way to slum it.  Especially when one thinks of the expense of bike touring.  One must have the ability to take time off work, as well as pay for expensive gear.  And then one goes out into the wild, to show how hard one is, to experience the rough life, and then when you've had enough, pop back to the "real world", wash off the grime.  I do remember when I was in Japan touring that I felt connected to the homeless population there, because we slept in the same places, stayed warm in the libraries together, and were shunned by the rest of society.  But of course, I had credit cards.  (I was also a foreigner and not confined by japanese societal rules, so my life was really nothing like the homeless population...)

On my first bike tour, I sewed into my panniers, "I will learn how to be a graceful drifter"

I wanted to know personally, what it feels like to sleep on streets. But I will never know because "when you're laying in bed at night, watching roaches crawl the wall, if you called your dad he could stop it all" oh, i'll "never be like common people, never know whatever common people know"

I don't know what to do with this thought.  Stop bike touring? No!  try to lesson my cultural tourism? Yeah, in certain ways that's happening, bike touring is actually becoming more of a literal form of transportation, a means to get from point A to point B.  The next bike tour, from Chicago to New Orleans, it won't be about self learning, it will be about a fun way to get from Chicago to New Orleans.  It will be about the people I'm riding with.  

I think that is what a lot of people see tour as.  So I'm not saying everyone is doing what I did.  And I did start this conversation by saying that bike touring is an acceptable form of slumming it.  Because it doesn't exactly hurt anyone, I don't think?

Ah, this isn't well thought out or written, but it's just something I'm thinking about.  SF has got me thinking politics. And the last two years has been me coming to terms with my privilege, and owning it, and then making something productive out of it, i hope.

End in site

Man, a lot has happened since 2010. But it doesn't feel that long ago. It started with bike tour in Japan, and now the end of this bike tour is in site. A lot of the past three years had been in preparation for this ride. And I purposefully didn't think about plans beyond this.  But now, uncertainty washes over me. I bike long days with nothing but my thoughts, and sure, I have a few things figured out. 

I know what I want. I have no idea how I'll get it. But experience tells me that knowing what you want is the most important part. Still. This mind of mine needs a plan. One week left. Plus a few days. And then it back to working so hard there's no time for thought, and the carrot that this ride has been for me. It won't be there. 

During the hard times of the last two years, and yeah, there have been fucking hard times. I'd lie in my bed and say, alaska, soon I'll be riding my bike and nothing you've said will matter. I will be happy and I will be strong. 

And I have been happy, and fucking amazingly strong. And the words of self doubt roll off my back. 

But I don't feel free. What needs to get done is hard to realize. That probably means its the truth. 

Ok. I'll do it. I always do what needs to get done.